Toxic Positivity at Work and Church
I’ve experienced a type of positivity on past jobs and at certain past churches that I think are truly toxic. Positivity and optimism is not necessarily and always a good thing. If it were we’d have seen Jesus Christ teach that and live that out. Jesus shows us a balance of reality based optimism, conflict and correction. Jesus frequently and lovingly acknowledges negative things, things that cause anger, and things that badly need to change. Which sometimes sounded very negative, insulting and emotional. Humanity needs correction and conflict. Correction is unavoidable wherever love is present.
I’ve experienced work cultures where all expressions of dissatisfaction, frustrations or conflict are not only ignored, disregarded, but were even punished.
It’s is commonly seen with strongly hierarchical groups with insecure leaders. They aren’t able to solve the problems, so the next best thing is to silence all reference and natural reaction to them.
Extreme positivity and hyper-optimism is deceptive because it is hard for most everyone to see optimism as a negative trait. It disarms people and sometimes ushers us into a delusional view of situations and people.
It is easy to conclude that overly negative and pessimistic people are toxic. But not very positive people.
Toxic positivity is a positivity mindset that goes beyond healthy optimism into a sort of required group-think. It is an attempt to control people with extroverted positivity. Those who don’t agree with the positivity itself or resist the control that they are feeling then become the scapegoated problem in the group. When those who dont agree are often the very people who can help the group or leader the most. Sometimes Jesus speaks through outsiders and through non-conformists. Sometimes Jesus MUST speak through the non-conforming because the conforming ones just won’t listen to the Lord within. They prefer to silsten to someone else.
Toxic positivity is stubborn in that it insists on dominating. This is seen when it unfriends and cold-shoulders those who disagree or don’t jump on board with the same way of thinking. It cold-shoulders people who do not match the person’s or a group’s way of thinking. The only option for the non conformers becomes remaining distant, shallow and silent or simply leaving the group.
Toxic positivity causes people to avoid and desperately try to control conflict, even healthy and godly conflict. Which was so common in the NT. So it can result in unfriending. I think I’ve even seen it cause or contribute to divorce, and this is one of the reasons I label it toxic. It is so divisive, it delays or prevents positive change and it can even become a form of phychological abuse.
Extreme positivity in churches has become one fruit of the word of faith gospel that was so popular in the 1990s. It is harmful and toxic to many expressions of love and Christian fellowship. Equally as harmful as is complaining, pessimism, and negativity. In a sense it can become a form of passive aggressive abuse.
Toxic positivity in a church setting is an indication of many things but I think the most important is that it indicates that leadership and the people misunderstand the gospel of the kingdom. They think they have to engineer the church, stifle all negativity and they misundertand childlike happiness with the joy of the Holy Spirit.
Some Psychological Studies
Now take these studies with a grain of salt. I put much more value on the words of Christ than I do psychological studies. I don’t put much stock in the present-day practice of psychology because I think it was largely destroyed years ago by governments and politics. And has become something largely unhelpful through the decades. An extension of the pharmaceutical lobby. Ignoring sound science to redefine psychological maladies for political or pharamceutical purposes. But… that does not discount the sound science and of every psychological study. Some are very helpful and psychology when done without ulterior motives can be very helpful.
Here is a psychological study of positivity and it’s link to mania:
http://gruberpeplab.com/pdf/Gruber.Johnson.Oveis.Keltner_2008_Risk%20Mania%20Positive%20Emo.pdf
Similarly, some research suggests that emotional regulation (always being positive) for some people can be harmful see: https://psycnet.apa.org/fulltext/2020-03346-001.html
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