Defeat, helplessness, surrender and weakness should not be associated with hopelessness, sadness and depression.
If these experiences send you to depression or hopelessness or resentment then let Jesus change that. In fact accepting these things is a prerequisite to entering the kingdom of Jesus by repentance.
Jesus went through all that but he remained relentlessly attached to his Father. To the point where he did absolutely nothing out of his own strength, resources, and self-will.
He was utterly empty and defeated he embraced defeat and his own end. SO THAT his father could live through him.
We are to now associate our defeat, our helplessness, our surrender and our weakness to Jesus Christ.
Don’t flee these outward things as they come into your life by looking for money and pleasure.
Let these common life experiences prepare the way, every single day to fellowship with Jesus Christ. He will resurrect you with his own life.