I think that arguing and doing conflict should be mandatory in all businesses, churches, and families. Love of truth does not punish disagreement and it does not abandon people who disagree on big issues. It even readily acknowledges when it is wrong with honesty. When everyone has the motive of getting at the truth conflict is a powerful tool for groups of people.

But shutting others down, cold shouldering, feigned politeness (to avoid conflict) and demand conformity is the real divisiveness. Conflict is not divisiveness as long as it is done with the correct motive. Punishing conflict passively is a subtle form of divisiveness… so we don’t confront it. We barely even acknowledge it.