There is nothing more rewarding than building a strong household.  Having my wife and kids around me for the holidays has been great this year. For the first time I’ve been able to spend a lot of time with them WITHOUT feeling a nagging sense of guilt for not working or unfinished business.

A household is a place to lay our heads, to feel safe, to feel warm and protected. Building a household is a fundamental human drive.  Building a good household I think is one of the primary responsibilities of parenting.  Whether that place is large or small, beautiful or ugly, a place to call home is needed and wanted by almost everyone.

Knowing how to build a healthy household does not necessarily come natural to most of us, especially men.  I am constantly learning from men who have done it well, from scripture and from experience at home. I have learned that anyone can build a healthy household with the following five essential building materials.  

1. “Concrete Footers” of love – husbands love your wife and do not be harsh with them.  I think that God knew that a common struggle for men would be with harshness toward his family.  For the man able to overcome this struggle and love his family with Gods help, a fruitful family life will emerge.
2. “Walls” of faith in God – walls protect a household from the elements, from thieves that would steal. Faith in God provides the protection needed to thrive and to survive.  The truth is our very lives depend on God and his protection because of the fact that there is evil, loss and death in this world.  Access to God and his blessings is by faith, it’s just how things are right now.
3. The “Roof” of financial management – if we can’t or wont manage well the finances of the home, be it a large or small home, a large or small income, we simply can not live where we want to live.
4. The “Heating System” of slow to anger  – James 1:20 says “the anger of man does not bring about the righteousness of God”.  Slowness to anger and “soft answers which turn away wrath” are essential, we simply can not do family without them.  Anger brings a destructive chill which unsettles the home, the family and it leads to many other destructive forces.
5. The “Plumbing System” of forgiveness – daily forgiveness removes the waste of resentment, the waste’s of wrath and retaliation that don’t belong at home.   Without the removal of these toxins the household will become a septic system of resentment, anger and hate and will eventually break apart.

Cottage At Dornie

Buildings are made with concrete, wood, shingles, furnaces and pipes but healthy households are built with love, faith in God, financial sanity, slowness to anger and forgiveness.

Are there any building elements missing from your household?